58 New Funny Minion Quotes with Images

😄 Minions are the perfect blend of chaos and charm, and their quotes are pure gold when it comes to lightening the mood. Here’s a handpicked list of 58 hilarious Minion quotes that are sure to brighten your week:

🍌 Funny Minion Quotes of the Week

1. “I made it through the day without beating anyone with a chair. I’d say my people skills are improving.”
2. “OMG! I almost went to the toilet without my phone!”
3. “I hate it when people ask ‘Do you have a bathroom?’ No, we pee in the yard.”
4. “Alcohol doesn’t make you fat—it makes you lean… against tables, chairs, floors, and walls.”
5. “My Saturday was going great until I realized it was Sunday.”
6. “Friends come and go, like waves of the ocean. But the true ones stick like an octopus on your face.”
7. “I’m one step away from being rich. All I need now is money.”
8. “I don’t like to think before I speak. I like to be just as surprised as everyone else.”
9. “Love me and I’ll move mountains. Hurt me and I’ll drop those mountains on your head.”
10. “Never sing in the shower. Singing leads to dancing, dancing leads to slipping, and slipping leads to paramedics seeing you naked.”

😆 Minion Sayings That Hit Just Right

11. “Don’t give me your attitude unless you want mine.”
12. “My tolerance level is extremely low. Proceed with caution.”
13. “You know you’re getting old when you feel bad in the morning without having had any fun the night before.”
14. “Warning! A virus called Monday is fast approaching. There is no cure.”
15. “Every day at work I wonder if this is the day I accidentally scream ‘Shut the heck up!’ out loud.”
16. “Life is all about ass. You’re either covering it, kicking it, kissing it, or behaving like one.”
17. “Respect your parents. They passed school without Google.”
18. “I might look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head, I’m quite busy.”
19. “Don’t worry about getting older. You still get to do stupid things—just slower.”
20. “I love my six-pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat.”

🤪 Bonus Laughs

21. “There should be an app to delete your number from other people’s phones.”
22. “The best thing about me? I’m a limited edition. No other copies!”
23. “If a bra is an ‘over-the-shoulder boulder holder,’ what’s men’s underwear? ‘Under-the-butt nut hut’?”
24. “If God shuts a door, quit banging on it. Maybe He closed it because you’re worth more.”
25. “Most people are lucky they can’t hear what I’m thinking.”
26. “Have you ever noticed the shortest friend is usually the craziest?”
27. “I was going to do something… then I got distracted for 5 seconds and forgot.”
28. “My four moods: I’m too old for this. I’m too tired for this. I’m too sober for this. I don’t have time for this.”

Want to go bananas with it? 🍌

Looking for the best funny minion quotes ever! Everyone loves minions and these hilarious minion quotes will put a smile on your face! Funny Minion Quotes Of The Week And Funny Sayings “I made it through the day without beating anyone with a chair. I’d say my people skills are improving. Looking for the quotes with minions sayings. Here are the best 28 Funny minion quotes of the week. photo credits Pinterest Here are the best funny minion quotes ever! Everyone loves minions and these hilarious minion quotes will put a smile on your face! See more ideas about minion quotes, minions funny, minions quotes.

We hope you will love them, make sure to share these excellent quotes with your minion lover friends .. Best 28 Very Funny minions Quotes

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Funny Quotes

1. If you don’t want a sarcastic answer. Then don’t ask a stupid question

2. Based on the look on I your face, I assume I thought out loud again

3. No issues today. I’m in my awesome bubble and you’re not allowed inside! G

4. Housework no one notices when you go do it, but everyone notices it when you don’t

5. In life, you will realize there is a role for everyone you meet. Some will test you, some will use you, some will love you, and some will teach you. But the ones who are truly important are the ones who bring out the best in you. They are the rare and amazing people who remind you why it’s

6. I may be a sweet girl, but… If you make me mad, I have a pocket full of crazy waiting to come out!!!

7. Nothing is permanent. Don’t stress yourself too much because no matter how bad the situation is… It will change.

8. I’m a lady, but when I’m mad, I’m an evil sadistic demon spawned bitch from hell that’ll make you wish you were never born… And when I’m happy, I bake cookies and shit.

9. My daughter wanted cinderella-themed party, so I invited all her friends over and made them clean the house!

10. C do you ever have a plan for the day and suddenly it’s 5pm and you have achieved literally nothing?

11. I’ve decided I’m not old. I’m 25 plus shipping and handling!

12. From this point on I’m going to treat people exactly how they treat me. Some should be glad, others should be scared.

13. I’m going to treat people exactly how they treat me. Some should be glad, others should be scared.

14. That moment when you walk into a spider web and suddenly turn 11 nto a karate master.

15. Husbands are the best people to share secrets with they’ll never tell anyone, because they aren’t even listening.

16. I’m not fat I’m fluffy!

17. No I didn’t say you were stupid. I said you bomberos are stupid. There is nothing past tense about it.

18. I try to be a nice person but sometimes my mouth doesn’t want to cooperate!

19. They’re called 마 ‘man hours’ because a woman would have that shit done in 20 min

20. chocolate comes from cocoa, which is a tree. That makes it a plant. Chocolate is salad.

21. When I text you a massive paragraph and you reply 40 minutes later with ‘k’ … Are you asking to be punched \ “

22. The awkward moment when you’ve already said ‘what?’ 3 Times and still have no idea what the other person said, so you just agree!

23. Sweet as sugar, hard as ice. Hurt me once, I’ll kill you twice

24. And so ends another week without me becoming unexpectedly rich

25. Okay. I get it, I made a mistake. Stop reminding me

26. Why can’t the house clean itself. It seems to get dirty by itself

27. Sometimes, no matter how nice you are, how kind you are, how caring you are, how loving you are it just isn’t enough for some people.

28. They say: you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone. Truth is: you knew exactly what you had; you just thought you’d never lose

29. stress = shit to remember every single second.

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