Minions have been everyone’s favorite of everyone. Since years people have been looking for minion quotes and funny minion jokes. These funny Minion quotes and lines are some of the most memorable moments from the movie. The Minions movie is all about the lovable,
We have come up with a handpicked collection of minion quotes funny jokes and funny monday quotes for instagram.
Funny Jokes Minions Quotes
1. “Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe one day you’ll find a brain back there!”
2. “If a bra is an ‘over the shoulder boulder holder’ then what would you call the men’s underwear? Under the butt nut hut?!”
3. “I licked it, so it’s mine”
4. “I’m at the age where an “All-nighter” just means that I didn’t have to get up to pee.”
5. “I have decided to cut back on being sarcastic. I solemnly swear to only be sarcastic on days that begin with T like… Tuesday, Thursday, today, & tomorrow.”
6. “If I manage to survive the rest of the week, I would like my straight jacket in hot pink & my helmet to sparkle.”
7. “Challenge only a genius can say these four words, four times really fast without getting tongue twisted. Eye, yam, stew, peed”
8. “The phone of A 6- year old today the phone I had when a was 6”
9. “No officer, I haven’t been drinking I was trying to avoid all the potholes!”
10. “Day 7 of social distancing: Struck up a conversation with a spider today. Seems nice. He’s a web designer.”
Best Minion jokes and sayings images | Minion jokes
11. “I have everything in my purse you could possibly imagine… …except money.”
12. “I’m not clumsy. It’s just the floor hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies, & the wall gets in the way….”
13. “Dear Easter bunny, this year could you please fill my eggs with health and happiness and deliver them to everyone that I love. Thank you.”
14. “Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth, then it just becomes a soap opera.”
15. “Wouldn’t it be so great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out wrinkle free… and three sizes smaller?”
16. “I just stepped on a cornflake. Now I am officially a cereal killer.”
17. “Warning: Bitch switch has been activated. Please step away from my perimeter!”
18. “The best feeling is waking up in the middle of the night and realizing you still have hours to sleep.”
19. “Sometimes you just have to close your eyes. Count to ten. Take a deep breath. Remind yourself that you wouldn’t look good in prison stripes and just smile at the dumbass and walk away.”
20. “Why do they call it “Beauty sleep” when you wake up looking like a troll!”
Best Minions Quotes & Humor images | Minions funny, Humor messages
21. “If someone throws a stone at you. Throw a flower at them. But remember to throw the flower pot with it.”
22. “Some of the best moments in life are the ones you can’t tell anyone about.”
23. “If people are talking about you behind your back, then just fart!”
24. “My fashion style is called ‘Whatever the hell still fits me’”
25. “Every day I arrive at work with good intentions and a great attitude.. then idiots happen.”
26. “Im not lazy. Im just on my energy saving mode”
27. “Good friends help you to find important things when you have lost them… your smile, your hope, and your courage.”
28. “Fight for you respect you include you encourage you need you deserve you”
29. “Stop editing your pics. What if you go missing? How can we find you if you look like beyonce on Facebook, and Chewbacca in person.”
30. “My therapist told me: the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M & Ms and a chocolate cake I feel better already.”
Best Very Funny minions Quotes | Minions funny, Humor messages
31. “Of course women don’t work as hard as men… They get it right the first time.”
32. “That awkward moment when you think you do a silent fart and it comes out like a machine gun.”
33. “I just saw myself in the mirror naked and I look like hell. How about a nice compliment to lift my spirits? Your eyesight is perfect.”
34. “Where does all my money go?? It’s like, hocus pocus I’m brokus”
35. “Being able to respond with sarcasm within seconds of a stupid question is a sign of a healthy brain.”
36. “My diet plan: Make all of my friend’s cupcakes. The fatter they get, the thinner I look!”
37. “It’s ok to talk to yourself, it’s even ok to answer yourself… But when you ask yourself to repeat what you just said – you have a problem!”
38. “The biggest lie I tell myself is “I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”
39. “Brains are awesome I wish everybody had one.”
40. “I’m not crazy. I prefer the term mentally hilarious.”
Best New Funny Jokes Minions Quotes Ideas, Humor Images
41. “I am who I am. Your approval is not needed!”
42. “Never hold your farts in. They travel up your spine, into your brain, and that’s where shitty ideas come from.”
43. “Dear Mr. Spider unless you pay rent… …you can’t live in my house.”
44. “If stress burned calories I’d be a super model…”
45. “How to stop time: Kiss How to travel in time: Read How to escape time: Music How to feel time: Write How to waste time: Social media”
46. “I hate it when im singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.”
47. “Sometimes you just want to throw fertilizer at people so they grow up!”
48. “If you can read this with ease you are twisted! And have an awesome talent! This is both backwards and upside down! Like and share if you can read this!”
49. “I’ve taken up photography because it’s the only hobby where you can shoot people and cut their heads off without going to jail.”
50. “I’m thankful my childhood was filed with bruises from playing outside, instead of apps and how many likes you get on a picture.”
51. “Here’s to the girls: To the girls who don’t wake up with perfect hair. Who don’t mind eating a big Mac instead of a salad. Who don’t wear 50 pounds of makeup. Who’d rather spend the day in sweatpants than skinny jeans. Who love the comfort of T-shirts. Who don’t get all the guys. Who’s not “Popular” but feels like it when they’re with their friends. Who stick to sneakers instead of heels. Who isn’t way. Who don’t get everything they want. Who doesn’t need a guy to tell them that they are beautiful.”
Funny Jokes Minions Quotes With Images
